2016 has gotten a very bad wrap. It was the year Prince died. The year where it seemed like a Black man was gunned down just about every week. And then to top everything off, Donald Trump was elected President of the United States. A travesty, really.
<img src="http://madamenoire.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/12/bettah-days-favorite-thing-feat.jpg" alt="" width="806" height="455" class="aligncenter wp-image-744227" />
Personally, this year has been a little rough for me too, with a couple of bright spots, the biggest of them being the fact that I published my first book, <i>Bettah Days. </i>For those of you who missed the memo this past summer, here’s the summary:
<blockquote><i>Even as a little girl, Constantine knew she didn’t want a marriage like the dried up one her parents had. Instead, she wanted it to mimic the sweet, American love songs her father played from his phonograph. But after a devastating heartbreak, the introduction of a charismatic stranger, and an unplanned pregnancy, Constantine finds herself in a relationship that is far more disappointing and dire than anything her parents endured. In the midst of motherhood, dissatisfaction and a challenging husband, Constantine must find the strength to choose peace over peril and forgiveness over fury.</i></blockquote>
When Victoria came up with the idea for this column, highlighting our favorite things, I thought perhaps it would be lame for me to write about my own damn book. Would people think I was licking my own a$$?! I’m sure there will be a couple of folk who do. But that’s not really the reason I’m writing about the book. Would I love for you to head over to <strong><a href="https://www.amazon.com/Bettah-Days-Veronica-R-Wells/dp/1535549866/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1482391755&sr=1-1&keywords=bettah+days">Amazon</a></strong> and buy it? Absolutely.
But honestly, the biggest reason <em>Bettah Days</em> is “the best of my 2016” is because of what it taught me about myself, how this story helped and healed others, especially my family members, and the fact that it was a completion of a goal for both myself and my grandmother as well.
I can’t tell you how many people said that me completing my goal inspired them to go after their own dreams. The conversations I’ve had with my aunts, uncles and cousins about the ways they’ve learned about their mother or grandmother was more touching than I imagined they would be. My telling of her story helped them to know her better. And considering the phenomenal person she was, that’s no small feat.
Writing this book, publishing it and the agonizing work of promoting it, has illuminated the ways in which I need to grow as both an author and woman. I know these are lessons I would have <em>only</em> learned through self-publishing. And so while it’s made me crazy many times over, I’m also grateful for the experience.
And lastly and most importantly, was the way <i>Bettah Days</i> helped to strengthen the supernatural connection my grandmother and I already shared.
When my grandmother passed away, my mother found a journal of hers where she’d documented some of the things she wanted to achieve in her life. I can only remember one of them: “Help the Poor.”
I remember reading that line and feeling a bit sad because I didn’t know if that was something she had accomplished. Fast forward 12 years later. I write this book about her life and in an attempt to spread the word about it, I decided to sell it in person at a small author’s event in the city. The experience was another learning one. But thankfully, I sold more books than I anticipated, so I had a bit of extra money in my pocket.
But the very next week, my church announced that they were hosting a donation for the poor in the Harlem community. I always try to participate in these types of things because I hate the feeling of semi-helplessness passing someone who is homeless and hungry on the street, especially when I don’t have any cash on me. The church provided a list of items they were accepting and after my sister and I went to the pharmacy, I was dismayed to find that a good chunk of my book money was <em>gone</em>. I was salty. I could feel my expression souring as I silently repeated the phrase “Money Come, Money Go” in my head. And I was irritated about it for a couple of hours. You see, the promotion of the book challenged me in more than just emotional/psychological ways. It also cost a helluva lot of money. And the second I got a little change, it disappeared. I didn't even get to enjoy it.
And just as I was slipping deeper and deeper into that self-inflicted funk, God showed me the image of my grandmother’s handwriting, the declaration that she wanted to help the poor. And for the first time it clicked for me that it was her story that had purchased the supplies for the homeless people who would eventually receive them. The completion of what I thought was a personal goal actually helped my grandmother achieve her own, decades and generations later. When I realized this, tears sprung to my eyes and I felt both selfish and foolish for having been so pressed about the money, especially knowing that it was used for something far, far greater than what I would have done with it.
Nothing and no one could have prepared me for that revelation and that blessing. And it wouldn’t have happened without me putting <i>Bettah Days </i>out into the world. For that, the process, the lessons and the revelations, I am eternally grateful to God and will forever remember 2016 as a career and life highlight.
<i>Veronica Wells is the culture editor at MadameNoire.com. She is also the author of <a href="https://www.amazon.com/Bettah-Days-Veronica-R-Wells/dp/1535549866" target="_blank" data-saferedirecturl="https://www.google.com/url?hl=en&q=https://www.amazon.com/Bettah-Days-Veronica-R-Wells/dp/1535549866&source=gmail&ust=1482480667711000&usg=AFQjCNHlOD3MkAxas899luWHcF5NBhF4Xg">“Bettah Days.”</a> You can follow her on <a href="https://www.facebook.com/veronicarwells" target="_blank" data-saferedirecturl="https://www.google.com/url?hl=en&q=https://www.facebook.com/veronicarwells&source=gmail&ust=1482480667711000&usg=AFQjCNHXYWQWHsGkSX_8T59P8P-dT5LCBg">Facebook</a> and Twitter<a href="https://twitter.com/VDubShrug" target="_blank" data-saferedirecturl="https://www.google.com/url?hl=en&q=https://twitter.com/VDubShrug&source=gmail&ust=1482480667711000&usg=AFQjCNHfrFEBP6NHllyYkOOUBpqdO_so8g"> @VDubShrug.</a></i>
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